Guardian Sport -1 May 08

A piece for this Thursday's Guardian Sports section. Buy it!

The article is about dubious and corrupt multi-millionaire International despots owning UK football teams, and what checks, if any, are carried out to assess their suitability for the position.

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Illustration Friday - "Wrinkles" No.2

I love the lines on a face
Read the lines
Read between the lines

Who wants to look like a shop-window mannequin?

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Illustration Friday - "Wrinkles"

The wrinkliest of wrinklies ever
Ladies, gentlemen, I present Methuselah
Son of Enoch, Grandfather of Noah, Large bottle of Champagne (!)
and, according to Genesis, the oldest chap ever to walk the earth.

It ain't necessarily so
It ain't necessarily so
De things dat yo' liable to read in de Bible
It ain't necessarily so

Methus'lah lived nine hundred years
Methus'lah lived nine hundred years
But who calls dat livin' when no gal'll give in
To no man what's nine hundred years

I'm preachin' dis sermon to show
It ain't nessa, ain't nessa
Ain't nessa, ain't nessa
It ain't necessarily so

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Illustration Friday - "Primitive" No.2

Another woodwose
(see previous post)

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Illustration Friday - "Primitive"

Here is the old medieval Wild Man o'the Woods or Woodwose.

The wodewose featured in medieval folklore as the "wild man of the woods". He had
no conscience, ate till he was full, and possessed a wild, unbridled sexual appetite.
He is decorated with oak leaves and carries a big club.

Sounds like my kinda guy, hehe.

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Morning Advertiser - Market Forces

Yet another job for pub trade mag the Morning Advertiser.

This is a piece about Market Forces and how its inevitable that more pubs close until demand and supply reach a stasis.

The Red Lion is the most common pub name in the UK but few people realize its the badge and symbol of John of Gaunt, founder of the House of Lancaster, you know, as in the War of the Roses.

As always
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Morning Advertiser - Rent

Another piece for the Morning Advertiser pub trade mag.

This one was on the thorny issue of the rent pub licensees/tenants have to pay their landlords.

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Happy St George's Day!

As an Englishman of Polish and Welsh parentage
I've always been amused by the fact
that the symbol of Wales is a red Dragon
and the Patron Saint of England
is usually shown killing one!

Anyway, a celebration of all good English things
- crumpets, pluck, sedate radio, brown bilious beer, Robin Hood, &c., &c...

As always,
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Morning Advertiser - Tomorrow's Drinkers

A piece I did for last week Morning Advertiser, a trade mag for the Pub industry.

This was about the changing habits of young drinkers and how this might pose a threat to pub culture.

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Guardian Money -12 April 08

A piece I did for the front cover of the Money section in last Saturday's Guardian.
It's about Gazundering.
Gazunder, according to Wikipedia, has two meanings

• A chamber pot, so called because it "goes under" the bed;^[1]
• In real estate transactions, gazundering is the practice of lowering an offer at the last moment, a variation on gazumping.

My image was illustrating the latter.

I did it originally with the orange-red colouring, but then decided I'd prefer something more pared down and simple. The greys somehow remind me of the French painter Fernand Léger.

Ps, apparently they went with the Orange one! hehe

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Illustration Friday - "Save" No 2

Save Illustration Friday Night!

Time has been called on this great site.
A grievous loss

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Illustration Friday - "Save"

Lord Save Me
from talk of
second homes, country hideaways, pied-a-terres, kerb appeal, original features, inside-out, the wow factor, buyers' market, mortgage deposits, clean sleek lines, wet rooms, property portfolios, neutral palettes, city crash pads, &c., &c., &c.

Don't people make homes in houses any more? It seems not,
Recession!? Bring it on!
signed middle-class, middle-aged and bored!

London Illustrators' Gathering (LIG) -Tues 15 April 2008

Come one, come all!
Everyone welcome

London Illustrators' Gathering (LIG)
Tues 15th April 2008
The Crown Tavern
43 Clerkenwell Green
London EC1R 0EG
7,30 pm onwards

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Guardian Sport -10 April 08

A piece for today's Guardian Sports section, done late yesterday.

It was for an article severely criticising Minster for Sport, Tessa Jowell, and her total incompetence, like estimating the cost of the Olympic Velodrome at £72m, and then, five months later, giving a revised figure of £242m!!

Unfortunately, at the 11th hour (well 4 pm actually) I was informed that due to the last minute placement of advertising the image needed to shrink to a miniscule 5.4 cm by 6 cm down, meaning that all I could show of the original was the Sports Minister's face.

Here are both pieces, the long original and the final truncated form.

It's very hard to catch a likeness, particularly under pressure, but there's definitely something there of Ms Jowell I reckon.

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Morning Advertiser - BDMs

A piece out in today's Morning Advertiser, a trade mag for the pub industry.
This piece is for an article about Business Developemnt Managers or BDMs. The conclusion was that they could all benefit from a spell actually working in a pub, to fully appreciate the concerns and working conditions of the Publicans they're dealing with.

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April Fools' Day / Poisson d'Avril !

There are many theories as to the origin of this pranksters' feast, from a change in the date of new year to the Roman festival of Hilaria, but either way its origins ( and by extension, the need for mirth, merriment, humour, jokes and general puckitude) go way back.

In England we say April Fools' Day!
En France on dit Poisson d'Avril! (April Fish!)

Apparently the origin of the latter expression lies in the fact that fish start to spawn at this time of year, and so only a fool would angle now whilst the stocks are trying to replenish.

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